Walter Slovotsky
Guardians of the Flame
(c) 1983-1995 Joel
Rosenberg
Miscellany
Slovotsky's Laws.
In theory, it's simple. Everything's simple, actually. First, you figure out what you want. Second, you figure out what you have to do to get it. And three, you do it. That's the way life works.
I'm not sure your stupidity is your fault. Though it damn well is your responsibility.
But mainly it's that it seems to me you've got one hell of a lot of potential. You use it right, and you can be one fine human being.
Complications... everything's got complications.
Sometimes I'm so clever I don't even understand myself.
Sorry, I couldn't resist it.
Face it: I'm irrepressible.
Not getting cut into bloody little slices is, after all, the key to a sound plan.
If somebody's going to bleed, I'd just as soon it not be little ol' me. It was only fair, after all: The rest of the universe consisted of millions and millions of people who collectively had millions and millions of gallons of blood; Walter Slovotsky had only he meager few quarts, all of which he continually put to good use.
You worry too much. Do more; worry less.
Foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.
There is no time like the present to open negotiations, even if one isn't sure if one wants to bring them to the obvious conclusion.
One of the many nasty facts of life is that innocence is no armor.
If you insist on juggling knives, you're going to get cut.
Some things seemed to improve with age. Some things were improved with age. And some were just fucked with until all their charm was gone.
Something would have to change. Idiot. Something always changes.
He could almost have laughed; He was always his own best audience.
I've always figured that talking beats fighting. And talking is only about my third favorite thing.
Fundamentally, every bar is the same as every other one, if it's the kind you're drinking in, to end a sentence with a preposition, which I haven't.
Arguing is one of life's greatest pleasures, even if you have to argue with yourself. 'Course, I could enjoy the other side of that argument, too.
I find that we all get more legendary as time goes by. "Legend" means, basically, "bullshit."
When the Black Camel comes for me, I'm not going to go kicking and screaming-I am, however, going to try to talk my way out of it. "No, No, you want the other Walter Slovotsky."
There just isn't any pleasing some people. The trick is to stop trying.
A little gentleness goes only a short way. Ladle it out generously, and often, when you can.
Grab what comfort you can, however you can, whenever you can. The ride gets real rocky 'way too often.
Lying, like eating, can be overdone.
Tell me again why it's a good idea to take a lot of changes.
Wanting it doesn't make it so. If it did, we'd all learn to want harder. I can already want quite vigorously, thank you very much.
Nothing is more annoying than somebody who has a keen eye for the obvious.
Figure it out fast-and so what if you're wrong? You may get lucky and implement the wrong one so that it works.
Audacity is a virtue that should always be practiced with caution.
There's a balance you have to learn, between being able to do a little of everything, and therefore nothing at all real well, and becoming overspecialized and completely useless outside your specialization. Learning that balance is, I've always believed part of becoming an adult. I figure I'm about twenty years overdue to learn it.
Sometimes, it's good to be wrong.
Involve yourself in the world. Reach out. Touch. Taste. Live. Trust me on this one, if on nothing else.
A hero's work is never done, which is one of the minor reasons I don't recommend the profession.
Boldness is like a condom. If you rely on it all the time, no matter how good it is, and no matter how good you are, eventually it will break.
Relax; the universe is out to get you.
When it comes to dealing with the law of averages, it's best to be a habitual offender.
God, give me the strength to change that which can be changed, the strength to change that which probably can't be changed, and the strength to change that which can't possibly be changed. Hey if You can't work miracles, what the hell good are You?
While it doesn't get the good press that hard work and industry get, laziness is a talent to be cultivated, like any other.